Birth Story #6

*** For my 6 other birth stories, go to My Birth Stories ***

 

As we prepare to give yet another talk on Experiencing God In Pregnancy this Saturday 29th March 2008, I realised that I had not posted our 6th birth on the website. I’d only blogged about it shortly after the baby’s birth.

So here it is to encourage those who are about to birth or perhaps is afraid to birth. And this is the verse that the Lord impressed upon me as I waited to birth the baby :

Hebrews 13:5 – 6.

For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”
So we may boldly say : “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?”

Birth #6 was an extremely exciting one, one that is given as a testimony to the faithfulness & awesome-ness of God the Father, through Jesus His Son. All glory to Him!

Baby #6 joined the family 6 days past EDD, weighs 3.34kg and is 50cm long.

4pm – I have had so many false alarms since Week 38 that I have lost count of them. So when contractions started at 4pm, 6 days past EDD, I just ignored it. Even though they were 10min apart. But the intensity was rather strong so I thought – well this could be it! So I got dinner ready and started preparing to bake Banana Bread for the next day’s breakfast.

6pm – As I was eating dinner, the contractions were strong enough to cause me to perspire. Hmm…this probably is IT! So I sms-ed my dad and told him to eat his dinner and prepare to come over. I finished up my dinner, went upstairs to pack all the last minute stuff – toothbrushes, comb…and showered. The longer I stood showering, the stronger and closer the contractions got. I got out of the shower & sms-ed my dad to start driving over.

About 7pm – I told dh that we should start bathing the younger children so that we could put them to bed earlier. I lay down at the couch to rest while he bathed them. The contractions continued at 10min apart but lasted longer & were definitely stronger.

8pm – My parents sms-ed me that they will wait downstairs till I was ready to leave. They can’t come upstairs to wait or the children will get too hyped up to go to bed.

8:20pm – Got the children upstairs to pray and ready for bed. Contractions now 7min apart.

9pm : Started to sms friends to start praying for me!

9:30pm – asked my parents to come up and wait. Dh opened up the sofa bed in case it is a long wait ahead – ha! Contractions now 5min apart, lasting 1.5min. Prayed for a sign to leave.

10pm – Laid on sofa bed. I’d always preferred to labour lying down sideways and usually fall asleep between the contractions. Contractions now lasting almost 2min long but still 5min apart.

Should I leave or not?

Contractions then moved to 3min apart. Just as I decided that we should leave, the contractions went back to 5min apart!

Then I felt the urge to push. Hmm….leave now? Then nothing. So I continued to wait. Another urge to push. Time to go, I told dh. I made my way to the toilet to relieve myself and discovered that a huge amount of mucous plug had been discharged! Oops! I may have waited a bit too long!

10:25pm Made way very slowly to the lift and car. Told dh that he needed to push back the middle row seats for me. The moment I climbed in, I felt the need to PUSH! I got onto all fours immediately (with 1 leg on the floor to stabilise myself).

Throughout the car ride, I felt the urge to push several times and then suddenly, pop!

“My bag has burst! Pass me the towel!” I told dh.

Thankfully the towel was packed right on top. Dh could continue to drive with one hand and toss the towel to me with the other.

At that moment though, I thought that the baby was about to be birthed there and then. Dh kept telling me that we were about to reach the hospital. But what I really wanted was for dh to stop the car somewhere for me to birth the baby!

When we reached Mt Alvernia, I thought dh rushed out to get someone to help me out. But he told me later that he just grabbed the nearest wheelchair he saw and with that, a male nurse came with him. But …. The baby is pushing out of me and they want me to sit on the wheelchair? How?!

The silly male nurse then told dh to go & park the car – like that is the most important thing to do at that point in time?! But he suddenly changed his mind and told dh “You better come with me!”

In between contractions, I managed to sit on the chair for them to wheel me into the lobby area. But because the urge to push was so strong, I pushed myself off the chair to try to labour on firm ground vs a shaky wheelchair.

But the same male nurse actually hauled me up back onto the wheelchair! So I shouted “The baby is coming out!” But of course no one believed me. He told me, “No, no, cannot!” Excuse me?! And tried to wheel me into the delivery suite.

One of the more alert nurses at the lobby must have decided that I was telling the truth as she quickly directed the wheelchair into the nearest examination room of the 24hr clinic of the hospital where I could see the baby’s head crowning as we passed the doorway.

And with everyone standing around and not knowing what to do, the baby’s head emerged. This comes the surreal part.

No one knew what to do.

Everyone stood standing and staring! I told dh, “Go and hold the baby’s head!” But before he could react, I saw the 24hr clinic doctor stepping forward and felt the the baby’s shoulders pushing through at the same time. The dr caught the baby and I heard her cry loudly!

Stunned silence.

The doctor continued to hold on to the crying baby. I had to say three times, “Give me the baby!” before he reacted. Then like in a slow-motion movie, everyone reacted. All talking at the same time.

And all they know what to do then was to keep saying “Cut the cord, cut the cord!” Dh had the presence of mind to remind them to wait for the cord to stop pulsing first! Meanwhile, baby was crying on & off while I held on to her. I tried to nurse her but she was too busy crying!

I asked dh to take pictures to document this interesting birth but realised that the camera & video were all still in the car! So he had to run out to get it. Then he got one of the nurses to take photos of him cutting the umbilical cord.

After birthing in that awkward position (sitting on my tailbone!) I tried to move into a more comfortable position. But guess what? They wouldn’t let me! They insisted that I had to sit that way while they wheeled me to the Delivery Suite to birth the placenta and clean up!

I was then wheeled to the Delivery Suite. I looked back & saw the mess I left behind. A huge puddle of mess! We then had to wait for more than an hour for the stand-in doctor to check me! My own doctor was on holiday in Bali!

Meanwhile baby was nursing happily and helping my uterus to contract. When the doctor finally came, he helped to birth the placenta and checked my perinium. He then pronounced that I did not have any tears!!! There would be no need for any stitches!

That was totally miraculous to me considering the awkward position I had birthed in and the speed with which baby was birthed! Praise God!

Reflections : I stand in awe of the obvious hand of God on this whole birth process.

On 6th June, dh & I got together to pray that :

• Baby will be born by 7th June
• Labour will be quick
• No tearing, no episiotomy
• Little disruption to household routine

Many people had asked if they should pray for baby to come only when my doctor is back in town and I have always told them that it didn’t matter. I was given Hebrews 13:5 and I rested in the assurance that The Lord is my Helper. I will not fear.

And truly – The Lord helped to birth this baby!

So for all moms-to-be, may you be encouraged as you prepare to birth. A painless, easy, quick birth IS possible – with God’s help.

For Things I Learnt From This Birth, click HERE.

More Birth Stories can be found under the Pregnancy and Labour Category on the right.

A Christian Antenatal Talk

If you are expecting or are planning to start a family, you may be interested to attend our talk at Wesley Methodist Church.

Titled, Experiencing God In Pregnancy, my dh and I will share a Christian perspective on pregnancy and childbirth.

Date : 29th March 2008 (Saturday)

Time : 2:15pm – 6:00pm

Venue : Level 3 Hall, Wesley Methodist Church

Cost : $2.00 per participant
(light refreshment will be provided)

We will cover the following topics :

• knowing your position in Christ,
• our Birth Stories,
• the Chrisitian’s antenatal response,
• preparing to be parents and
• Q & A

If you are interested in attending, please contact Evangeline Leong at 68378610. Do pass this on to your friends who may be interested. But please note that this is not a medical talk.

Quotes to Live By

Here are some quotes that one would need to think upon when the going gets tough!

Dorothy Morrison, My Turn, Newsweek, October 17 1988. p14

Homemaking is not employment for slothful, unimaginative, incapable women. It has as much challenge and opportunity, success and failure, growth and expansion, perks and incentives, as any corporate career.

Maya Angelou for Success

What you’re supposed to do when you don’t like a thing is change it. If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it. Don’t complain.

Dorothy Kelley Patetrson, Where’s Mom? The High Calling of Wives and Mothers, Crossway Books, 2003, p20

The best way to make homemaking a joyous task is to offer it as unto the Lord; the only way to avoid drudgery in such mundane work is to bathe the tasks with prayer and catch a vision of the divine challenge in making a home, helping husband, and nurturing a child.

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Check out my Blog, Building An Ark in Singapore, to see what we have been up to.

Easy Homeschooling Tips by Lorraine Curry

I am re-producing this article written by author Lorraine Curry of Easy Homeschooling books. It is a timely reminder for me as we plod on the school year. May it also bless you.

My 10 Biggest Mistakes
By Lorraine Curry

Mistake #1
BEING TOO EASY ON OUR BOYS

Dr. Raymond and Dorothy Moore suggest that boys are not ready for formal learning until they are between 8-12 or 14. I misinterpreted this and required very, very little from my boys when they were younger. It was a mistake! My girls were read to and “taught” more consistently from a younger age, and consequently have a higher degree of literacy and mental ability, although they are not that much older than the boys. (No, I do not believe it is merely a difference of the sexes!)

Boys as well as girls will thrive with much early reading aloud, silent reading and “writing” in the form of narrating, or telling stories that Mom captures on tape or writes down. My girls did not even need a spelling class! See more in my book, Easy Homeschooling Techniques.

Mistake #2
NOT KEEPING A CONSISTENT TIME SCHEDULE

Although schooling does not have to be difficult, we fail our children greatly if we do not teach that there are time demands in life and teach them habits and consistency.

Mistake #3
STARTING A BUSINESS BEFORE HAVING A CONSISTENT SCHEDULE

Too many times my business took priority. Schooling would have received its proper time slot, had a firm schedule been in place. I have a whole chapter on business in my book. More than “go for it,” I recommend waiting!

Mistake #4
ALLOWING “PLAY” AND UNRELATED “TALK” DURING SCHOOL TIME

These activities waste much time. Sure, social time is good, but have it before (or after) you start your school time.

Mistake #5
NOT TEACHING MANNERS DILIGENTLY ENOUGH

Teach the strictest basic manners when your children are young! You can always ease up later. There are only a few that should be diligently trained. I love the Southern tradition of teaching children to say “Yes, Sir, Ma’am.” Table manners include chewing with mouth closed, not speaking while eating and waiting to eat until after prayer. Other manners are not interrupting someone who is speaking, and holding doors for the female members of the family. Some manners, such as standing when a woman comes in a room and tipping one’s hat as a greeting, seem to be obsolete, but the basics will never be obsolete!

Mistake #6
NOT PRAYING ENOUGH

That explains itself! Let’s not take God for granted or limit Him! He is mighty and can do marvelous things in our homeschools to help overcome the struggles and discouragement we all seem to experience.

Mistake #7
FAILING TO REQUIRE BOOKS READ; A SPECIFIC NUMBER OF PAGES PER WEEK.

We are doing this now and it is making a difference in our children’s ability to express themselves, well as in their knowledge store.

Mistake #8
NOT ENCOURAGING (ENABLING) EXTRA-CURRICULAR SUCH AS MUSIC OR VOICE LESSONS, AS INTEREST AND APTITUDE ARE SHOWN.

We live “so far” from lessons and I “hate” to leave my home, so I did not make the sacrifices necessary for this. We have four fabulous voices and one or two that are even potentially opera “material.” I’m glad it’s “never too late”!

Mistake #9
ALLOWING INCOMPLETE OR CARELESS WORK

It is such a temptation to do this! When the child thinks they are done with school for the day, and the mom is already doing something else, it is very difficult to make the child recopy or correct errors! But it is very important. This too is training. Good or bad, the choice is ours.

Mistake #10
ALLOWING DAILY USE OF SUGAR OR SUGAR PRODUCTS

There is such a difference in concentration when sugar is used! What is called ADD is probably no more than this! Minds really don’t work as well when diets are not their best.

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Lorraine Curry is the author of 5 Star Easy Homeschooling books. See more articles, FREE copywork, subscriptions, ebooks and more at her website at http://www.easyhomeschooling.com

More Easy Homeschooling Tips.

Find FREE Resources and 5-Star Books at Easy Homeschooling

So much busywork – for mom!

Note : This is to encourage those who are thinking of homeschooling their pre-schoolers but are feeling overwhelmed. 

Lesson Plans, Circle Time, Flashcards, Reading Aloud, Phonics Lessons, Lapbooks, Arts & Crafts, Bible Memory Verses, Field Trips…..

The list goes on…..

Some homeschooling moms I have come across, through emails or chit chatting, put in a huge amount of effort to ensure that their homeschool is a success.

In the beginning of my homeschool journey, I used to be so intimidated with the huge amount of stuff moms are doing with their children. Obviously, I was not doing all that with my children.

Even now, after homeschooling for the past 3.5, almost 4 years, I still occasionally do feel intimidated and sometimes fearful – oh no! they are doing all that for their 2 year old?! I am not even doing half of what they are doing with my 6 year old! 

But experience tells me that the huge amount of work these moms put in is often not sustainable in the long run. And definitely not when you have no help at home and more than 2 children.

Mom runs herself ragged trying to fit everything into a day on top of daily stuff that needs to be done. And soon mom feels like giving up since it is just too overwhelming.

Mom needs to ask herself WHY she is doing all these things. Is she trying to replicate school in her home? Seriously, that is just not possible. Schools have an army of teachers to help out. Teachers do not need to worry about meal planning or wiping up after a toddler. But mom has to juggle many roles.

Or is mom trying to follow some other homeschool moms whose family situation or dynamics is different from hers?

And honestly, does the pre-schooler need to have so much cramped into his day?!

My advice to those who are contemplating homeschooling your pre-schooler but are feeling overwhelmed?

Focus on the basics and then add in the extras when you can.

Decide what your basics are. (Mine are being able to read and being able to do simple maths). Sure plan for the extras (arts & crafts, field trips….) so that you won’t forget to do them but don’t worry if you just can’t. 

Once you get the hang of having your child at home and teaching him the basics, you will find that can add in the extras easily. But don’t try to do everything at the word “go”. You also need to give your child a chance to practice what he has learnt instead of being bombarded with new stuff all the time.

And give your pre-schooler plenty of free time to be bored! Yes, be bored so that he will learn to find things to do on his own. There is no need to entertain your child all the time. If he has siblings then he needs to learn to play with his siblings. That is educational too!

Please, I am not saying do not do all these fun and exciting stuff with your children. If you love doing all these stuff and more importantly your children enjoy them, then please continue and go ahead with what you are doing. You are doing a great job!

But if you are feeling the pressure to perform and do a song-and-dance each day just because you think that is necessary just because some other people are doing it, you may want to re-think how you do your homeschooling.

Personally, I have tweaked and tweaked and am still tweaking our homeschool. It has been challenging to add baby #6 into the mix last year and teaching 2 in primary level. I have reduced my expectations and cut back their work load (which was already very light to begin with!) while we adjust to a baby that is crawling everywhere and needs to be near mom all the time. No point to pile on the work when I can’t clear it fast enough. We are doing more real alouds and being more relaxed in our homeschool.

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Check out my Blog, Building An Ark in Singapore, to see what we have been up to.

Homeschool Helps

This blog, Heart Of The Matter Online, may be of use to those of you who are starting out in Homeschooling. It’s FREE!

Sign up for their newsletter and you’ll get loads of information about homeschooling. Click HERE for a posting on Math Manipulatives.

The Old Schoolhouse Magazine Goes Digital!

The Old Schoolhouse Magazine is now offering a digital version of their magazine at a fraction of the cost of the print version!

Subscription fee for the digital version is normally US$16.95 for 4 issues.

But get this – to launch the magazine, they are having a special month long promotion. The earlier you subscribe, the more you save!

The subscription fee from now till 18th March is only US$10.95 and you get 5 bonus gifts along with it! BUT this price will increase to US$12.95 next week with 3 bonus gifts. If you wait till the week after, then the price goes up to US$14.95 with 2 bonus gifts. And after that, the price will be US$16.95 and you get just 1 bonus gift. (I just ordered mine!)

If you are a homeschooling mom, or preparing to homeschool, this magazine will definitely be of interest and encouragement to you. Check it out for yourself! Click on the banner above or below to get to the page directly.

The Folly of Comparison

Do you ever feel that you are a failure and that everyone else has it all together except you? Happens to me all the time!

Or have you ever visited someone’s website or blog and widen your eyes in amazement at the amount of stuff they have done or are doing with their child? And you, in comparison, have done zilch compared to them? Happens to me all the time – again.

Well, the good news is – you are not alone!

And the better news is – no one really has gotten their act together! Really.

We all have our strengths and weaknesses. Someone may be totally great in the kitchen, whipping up healthy and delicious meals for her family everyday while another may be great at explaining mathematical concepts to her child/ren.

It is easy to look at someone’s strength, compare it to your own and then feel totally inadequate. It is unwise to do that. I am not saying that we should not strive to better ourselves. But we should stop beating ourselves up over our weak points and instead, focus on the strengths and gifts God has blessed us with and be thankful for them.

God truly made us all different. I see this in my 6 children all the time.

When we look at others and start comparing ourselves to them, we tend to want what they have. The question we then need to ask ourselves is : 

WHY do we want these things.

Is it out of the fear of losing out? Is it to prove something to someone or to yourself? Is it to get affirmation from the people around us?

And what is the price that you are paying to achieve all these things?

Stress and sleepless nights? Fear and worry?

The motivation to do our best should be because it pleases God, not because we want to be as good or better than the next person.

Colossians 3:23 says, “And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men”.

And one more thing – be happy for that person who is able to accomplish so much.

Good Deal from The Urban Homemaker

Saw this from an email loop I am on. So I thought I’d just pass it along. You actually get over US$60 in ebooks/audios for only US$9.97!!

Click this link for more information :
http://www.urbanhomemaker.com/productcart/pc/viewContent.asp?idpage=15

Homeschool eStore is now CurrClick!

In case you were looking to purchase something from Homeschool eStore and have been putting it off, now is a good time to get as they are offering a 10% account credit on every single purchase you make 10th to 17th March 2008.

This is to celebrate their name change from Homeschool eStore to CurrClick or Curriculum in a click. Click HERE to find out more.

Do you know that they have thousands of curricula on their website in eBook form? An example is my purchase of Writing Strands curriculum. I paid US$15.16 (versus US$20.00!) through them and saved on shipping as well!

Most of their eBooks are 30% off and the best part – to me – is that you pay ZERO shipping!

Another great benefit of signing up with them is their weekly free eBook they offer to their subscribers. So do go and check it out! Click on the logo below to bring you directly to the site. Have fun browsing!