Building Up Moms

Entries from August 2008

Myth #4 : I am a disciplined/organised person

August 29, 2008 · 1 Comment

I may be slightly more organised than most people but I would hardly describe myself as organised or disciplined.

I like things to be organised around me (chaos is very distracting) but that does not mean that I love to organise things or that it comes naturally to me. If left alone, I’d be too lazy to bother!

It is strictly due to circumstances that I am organised at all. Let me share with you that when I was a young woman living under my parent’s roof, I lived in a terribly messy room. I would tidy it up maybe once in 3 months or was it 6?! But it was definitely not weekly or even monthly.

My mom gave up telling me to organise it long ago. Her sister, my aunt, was amazed the first time she saw my room. She couldn’t believe that I, who was generally well groomed (read : vain), lived in such a messy room.

Fast forward to today, the house is still not a showroom piece and there are things strewn around the house even now as I am writing this article, especially on my table! But it is generally organised.

I know it is organised because the children know where each piece of item belongs to. There are 8 of us in this house and we are home most of the time. The house is lived-in. The children play all over the house (I don’t limit them since the space we have is not exactly big), we homeschool, we have a toddler! And did I say that there are 8 of us?

There will be mess.

But it can be tidied up in a jiffy. All I have to do is assign each child an area and they’ll be able to get it packed in no time at all. This can only happen because I subscribe to the mantra – there is a place for everything and everything has its place.

How did this happen? Not overnight I assure you. I read and read and read voraciously various books and websites, to learn how to organise and declutter. And as I slowly got myself organised, I liked what I saw and so continued. So much so that I can now dispense advice to people on how to be organised! :) Actually organising stuff is the easy part. Maintaining it is the big challenge for me.

Being disciplined is also something I wouldn’t describe myself as! If I were really disciplined, I would have my meal plans ready all the time instead of often deciding what to cook on the morning itself! So much for telling everyone to plan their menus, right? See? It is much easier to dispense advice than to actually do it!

I have some discipline left over from my dancing days :) Yes, I used to dance ballet with the Sylvia McCully and I would say that I was a very disciplined dancer. But erm…that discipline did not spill over to the rest of my life, unfortunately :(

 

Now mostly, I discipline (read : force) myself to get up and do what a mom is supposed to do and homeschool daily only coz we have to give a report to the Ministry of Education at the end of the year! So here I am, still struggling daily to be more organised, more disciplined, so that life is a little less chaotic and there’s more peace in the home. It certainly does not come naturally or easily.

 

Check out the rest of the other myths HERE.

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For my personal musings, visit Building An Ark In Singapore

Categories: Family

Being Frugal – Groceries

August 27, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Ever since we were featured on Sunday Times, many have asked how we keep our grocery bill to just $150/week. We used to be able to keep it down to $120/week till all the various food items rose in price. But do bear in mind it is an average. Some months are higher, some lower.

What does our bill include?

It includes all food items, as well as toiletries (soap, shampoo, toothpaste, etc.), diapers and household items (detergent, dishwashing liquid, batteries, etc.) So this means that on certain months, our bill does go up to $170-$190/week, depending on whether we are stocking up on sale items or not.

Generally, the children and I eat most of the 3 main meals and afternoon snacks at home, except on Sundays and some Saturdays. Dh is the only one who eats most of his lunches out.

And do note that the average of $150/week does not include takeways or orders from MacDonald’s when mom is too lazy or sick to cook :) Also, I forsee the bill creeping higher as the children hit puberty one-by-one! 

Supermarket or wet market?

It used to be that the wet markets offered a better deal. But with supermarkets growing in size and popularity and therefore being able to make full use of economies of scale to bring down their prices, I have switched to buying most of my groceries from NTUC.

But I must say that I much prefer buying my fish and fresh noodles from the wet market!

So how?

a) Menu Plan
You must have heard this a thousand times. The best way to manage your grocery bill is to plan your meals – every single one of them. If you know what you are going to cook, you’ll know what to buy and how much to buy. Otherwise, you end up with a lot of wastage.

See So What Is For Dinner?

*Disclaimer – I have stopped all meal planning since I was 5 weeks pregnant. I cook what I think I can stomach without feeling nauseous. I am sure you can understand that! :)

 

Now, menu planning does not mean you are stuck eating the same food day in, day out. But it means that you will have a repertoire of meals you can count on to be available throughout the week. And you don’t have to keep running to the supermarket to get what you don’t have in your pantry.

For more on menu planning, you can google for various websites and blogs to help you along.

b) Eat simply
Unlike most Chinese families who eat 2 – 3 dishes plus a soup at each meal, we have only 1 meat/fish dish and a vegetable dish and rice for lunch and dinner. Sometimes for lunch, we only have 1 meat dish and porridge.

More importantly than cutting down on our grocery bill, this helps cut down the time I spend on food preparation and cooking. I can’t be spending hours preparing and cooking every single meal.

c) Buy what’s on offer
In Singapore, very few places allow you to buy fresh food in bulk. Most/all (?) supermarkets cater to the 2-child family so portions are usually very small. So the way to save is to buy what’s on offer, if possible.

With regards to toiletries, I buy in bulk when I see stuff like diapers, toilet paper, shampoo on offer. And of course, buying the re-fill packs is cheaper than buying it by the bottle.

d) Buy frozen food
Yes, the gourmet cooks amongst you will shudder :) But honestly, I don’t taste the difference when used in appropriate dishes. I don’t use them for making soups as I find frozen meat not as flavourful as fresh ones. But if I am stewing or braising the meat, frozen works just as well. But I must say, some brands are tastier and juicier than others. You’ll have to experiment to find which ones suit your family.

e) Choose less expensive meats/cuts
Yes, this means we eat more of the “common variety” chicken and pork rather than beef and fish. We still have them but not every week and certainly not every day.

The cut of meat also affects its pricing. Chicken breast meat is cheaper than chicken thighs. Minced pork is cheaper than pork fillet.

Again, I am not saying we don’t ever buy the more expensive cuts of meat but just less often.

f) Eat your leftovers
if you’d planned your meals well one shouldn’t have any leftovers to deal with. Unless one deliberately cooked in excess to freeze the leftovers for another meal.

If there should be leftovers, don’t throw them away! Try to re-use it. Eg. leftover rice can be accumulated and voila! morph into fried rice. Leftover chicken? Shred it and use it in your noodles or porride. Get creative!

g) Buy what’s in season
This refers more to fruits than meats. You do realise that while many fruits are available all year round, their prices are not the same all year round? :) If it is not the usual season for that particular fruit, prices would soar. So we don’t buy then.

We also try to buy what’s native to the region rather than your exotic fruits. So we buy papaya and water melon versus strawberries and cherries.

h) Little or no organic food
Although I know health benefits of eating organic, my practical side rules. Organic meat is definitely out though I haven’t tried the much touted Sakura chicken (no antibiotics!). Some organic vegetables occasionally appear on our table.

Now if we had special health needs, I may then have to tweak this.

h) Drink Water
We are not a milk drinking family. Neither are we a juice drinking family. Everyone drinks water. Water after meals, water in between meals. The baby drinks breastmilk exclusively. And when she weans, she eats and drinks what we eat and drink.

Dh is the only one who drinks flavoured drinks – he can’t do without his Ribena and morning coffee.

We invested in a water filter three years ago so we also save on not needing to boil our water :) And the water does taste fresher.

i) Snack less
Or don’t snack at all, if possible! Not only is it a great way to lose/maintain mom’s weight, :P it’s also healthier for all. Well, unless you are snacking on healthy snacks like fruits.

j) Cloth diapering
I cloth diapered child #2 to #5. By then, the cost of a disposable diaper dropped from 50cents to barely 20cents per piece. So we went with disposables for child #6! Cloth diapering did save us money (and saved the environment) since we used it for so many of them but it was also a commitment to keep on using them especially when one was pregnant and had to spray off a toddler’s poo!

I hope by sharing these tips, you will be able to see how you too, can spend less on your groceries. But please, please note : do NOT compromise on your health just to save a few dollars here and there.

For more on frugal living, check out Being Frugal and Dealing with rising costs that I wrote some time back.

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For my personal musings, visit Building An Ark in Singapore

Categories: Home Management

Yes, that’s our family in the Sunday Times

August 26, 2008 · Leave a Comment

And yes, we are expecting our 7th child. :)

In case you missed the article, it is at the moment still available online at :

http://www.straitstimes.com/News/Home/Story/STIStory_271316.html

I am not sure how long this link is for though.

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For my personal musings, visit Building An Ark in Singapore.

 

Categories: Announcements

Building A Household of Faith

August 23, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Just to let you know that my dh, Henson will be conducting another 2-night session on Building a Household of Faith at Wesley Methodist Church on 27th & 28th August, 2008.

A synopsis of the session is found below. If you would like to attend, please contact Evangeline Leong at 6837-8610.

Building a Household of Faith

The prophetic word has been given that families will come under even more tremendous pressure and attack in these last days. What are our roles as Christian parents in these final days? Amidst the stresses and pressures of work and life, how do we stay focused to the task and not give up? Is it just parenting skills we need, or a clear and concise understanding of God’s word and His mandate for parents as they seek to build a household of faith? This course examines the state of the family today, and the pressures it is exposed to. Against this backdrop, it also highlights the urgency for Christian households to get back to God’s Word and His design for their families to live victoriously in these trying times.

  • Purpose
    • The Need for Godly Vision in the Family
  • Prayer
    • The Power of Prayer
    • Praying Together as Husband & Wife
  • Partnership
    • Working with God
    • Being Watchful
  • Position
    • Our Position in Christ
    • Standing Watch Over the Weak Areas
  • Preparedness
    • The Weapons of Warfare
    • Equipping the Household
    • The Role of Discipline
  • Prophetic
    • Hearing the Voice of God
  • People
    • The Household in Community
    • The Household in Accountability
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    To find out what’s happening in our lives, visit my blog at :

    Building An Ark in Singapore

    Categories: Announcements

    Myth #3 : I am very patient

    August 22, 2008 · Leave a Comment

    or that I must love children….

    Sadly, I have never been a patient person. Life would probably be a lot easier if I had been born one. And I never did like children too much. I didn’t hate them but I am one those rare women who does NOT go around cooing at babies or asking to carry them.

    Now that I am a mother, I still don’t go around asking to carry other people’s babies. I just don’t get women and mothers who do. I mean – carry your own lah! :P

     

    Many assume that just because I choose to stay home with the children I must be very patient. Why? Why this assumption? Some have even commented that I must never shout at the children, (there’ll be another post on this later on), right? And when they find out that I do (really?!) they heave a sigh of relief.

    Or they assume that just because I homeschool the children, I, again, must be very patient. Huh? Have you tried teaching your kids? Everyday? Don’t they just drive you nuts with the blank stares and “I dunnos”???

    Sorry, another myth busted!

    I am not a patient person BUT I have become more patient over the years. I certainly pray that it is due to the growth of the fruit of the Spirit* in my life!

    And while I still do not go around asking people to let me carry their babies, I will not be distressed if I had to babysit someone’s child/ren. But please, do not ever volunteer me for a baby/toddler Sunday School class, ok? :)

     

    *  But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Galatians 5:22-23. Emphasis mine.

     

    Check out the rest of the other myths HERE.

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    To find out what’s happening in our lives, check out my blog at

    Building An Ark in Singapore

    Categories: Family

    Myth #2 : We are very spiritual

    August 10, 2008 · Leave a Comment

    The Bible says :

    Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD,
             The fruit of the womb is a reward
    Psalm 127:3

    So those who have many children must be more spiritual that the rest, right? And that’s why we have been rewarded with many children?

    WRONG!!!

    I don’t think the bible infers that at all. Read a related article from my dh’s website, A Parent by the Grace of God.

    I certainly hope there aren’t people out there thinking that they NEED to have many children to prove their spirituality! Or those who look at others who have one or two children as being less spiritual.

    God chooses whom He chooses. Whether you have one child or 20, doesn’t make you more spiritual.

    Then there are those who feel that we must have a lot of faith to have this large a family since raising children is an expensive exercise in Singapore. Well….

    We may seem to have more faith than most people but you can have the same faith! Faith is not something that grows within you overnight. But it grows! It is God who increases our faith as we trust in Him. Everytime you place your trust in Him, He grows your faith and on and on it goes.

    We probably pray more than those with less children, but erm…our prayers more often than not, go, “Oh Lord, why me?!?!?!” or “Help me, Lord!!!” Lol!

    We could all do better with our prayer lives I am sure. We all know that we need to spend time with the Lord to do what He has called us to do but – horrors! – we also fall by the wayside! We know that unless we abide in the vine (John Ch15), we cannot bear any fruit but then, we are also human and the easiest thing to do when your To-Do list is a mile long is to forgo our time with the Lord.

    Been there, done that. :( There are times when I have gone weeks without opening my Bible except for doing school with the children! And then I wonder why I am so tired, so miserable and so discontented.

    Other times, I just didn’t feel like praying or reading the Bible – another shocker, eh? The tv, the internet, the books, the magazines all seem more interesting than the Bible.

    So no, trust me, we are definitely as sinful as the next person and could definitely spend more time in prayer and meditaion with the Lord. We are so not super spiritual!

     

    Check out the rest of the other myths HERE.

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    If you want to know what we have been up to, drop by my blog,

    Building An Ark In Singapore.

    Categories: Family